You're not alone.
WHOA.... Did you just watch that video?! Were there tears in your eyes?
A precious friend sent me this video. It touched my heart more than she will know! This video so perfectly explains the emotions that women like me, and maybe you, feel. All I ask, is this... Keep those struggling in mind. So many of the 1 in 8 are silently suffering.
Here are some things to say and to do that have felt.... well, right.
"I can't imagine what you are going through."
Unless you have been through the exact same situation as anyone you talk to, you don't know. As anyone who has struggled (isn't that all of us?) we all just want empathy. This applies to ALL kinds of life struggles.
"I am here for you whenever you need me to be a shoulder to cry on or a venting session."
We all really need people that we can call to express all emotions. I have my people that I can call and not say much and just cry with. I have people who I can vent to and they are amazing listeners. I always love to hear if there are any others that feel this way. I never want to assume someone wants to hear about my situation, so... Let them know that you are available. Even if they don't take you up on it, the offer means SO SO SO SO much!
"I never want to pry, but I think about you/pray for you often."
This is such a great thing to say on so many levels! It shows that you are interested in their journey and that you are invested in them. I will tell you right now, there have been multiple people that have said this to me. Some I respond thank you, BUT some I will tell them that I am ok with them asking questions. Allow us to decide who we let in. There is a big difference that we can easily feel when someone is invested or nosey. Nosey isn't what you want to be.
"Life is unfair."
Yep. It is. Enough said.
"If there is anything you need, let me know." Support their decisions.
No couple can endure infertility treatments forever. At some point, they will stop. This is a tough decision to make and it involves some grief. Did you see that it says support their decision? I don't need you to agree with me.
Allow whoever is struggling to process your pregnancy news.
Please don't tell us in public in front of other people. This is your fair warning (you can thank me later). I have not responded the best. Did I wish I could take it back? YES. Unfortunately, though, I can't. It has ruined friendships (which, is a whole different discussion. Should it have affected us, no). I just needed more time to process it. Let me tell you that I am always so extremely happy for my friends when they are pregnant. I just have a little pity party and then I'll snap out of it!