Follow Up

Today was the follow-up to my exploratory laparoscopic surgery. Last night I was anxious. I didn't know what to expect. I was obviously hopeful, but my nerves were getting the best of me. I was reaching out to my friends about how anxious I was feeling. They offered to meet for coffee or breakfast afterwards no matter what the results and/or outcome was. One friend, Michelle, offered to have tissues and a diet coke or champagne and popcorn. :)

We were given the awful appointment time of 7:30am. We showed up and were the only people in the waiting room. Not long after we sat down, we were taken back to a room. Oh, after they weighed me. Like that is necessary. *insert eye roll*

Dr. McFadden came in and talked about his findings, which I thought I knew all the information already. Some of this you have already read, but there is a little more.

The findings: My pelvic region looks great. My bladder looked great. My ovaries are good. Here is there difference. It was mentioned that I had endometriosis in my uterus, and that was all. Well, Dr. McFadden informed me, "there was a substantial amount of endometriosis in your uterus AND tubes, that we cauterized". I was under the impression that there was a small amount of endometriosis in my uterus, only. This just explains a little more why pregnancy might be a little more difficult for me. Dr. McFadden said that the next 3-6 months are the most crucial. He even mentioned that we needed to hit the ground running. Here is the study that supports this...

Ninety infertility patients with moderate endometriosis were randomized between laparoscopic electrocautery, studied for 7 months after treatment. Twenty of the 45 patients undergoing electrocautery conceived (44%) during the follow-up interval.

So, the question is.... Now what?

We will go on with the same meds that I was on previously before surgery. Why would we stop them if they can keep the chances of getting pregnant higher than without them? We will go on with the meds for 4-6 months until the next option in discussed.

When I was talking to my mom about my appointment, she asked, "how do you feel about this?". I'm okay with it. Do I want to wait 4-6 months to see if it works? No. Do I have an option? No. Unfortunately everything is a waiting game when it comes to infertility. Every month has the potential to be a miracle but continues to let me down and instantly reminds me of being a failure. I know, you're thinking, don't say that. You aren't a failure, but out of anything that has happened in my life, infertility has made me feel "less than". It makes me question my worth, constantly. Carrying my own child and being a mom was my biggest life goal and I'm still trying to get that.

Here is to the next 4-6 months. Keep your fingers and toes crossed for us!